Category Archives for "Blog"

Jun 03

What is Emotional Intelligence?

By Aireen Panganiban | Mental & Emotional Health

What is Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EI) refers to a person’s ability to recognize emotions within themselves and others, and understand these emotions. It is the ability to use emotional cues as guide to one’s thoughts, behaviors and actions. An emotionally intelligent person is able to adapt to changing environments, and continue to work towards a goal.

If this sounds like the description of a successful salesperson, you’re correct. Emotional intelligence has an immense impact on sales performance. In fact, Colleen Stanley, author of Emotional Intelligence For Sales Success (in an interview with sales speaker and strategist Jill Konrath), describes EI as: “It’s your ability to identify, assess and control your own emotions and other’s emotions. It has a direct impact on sales results.”

Emotional Intelligence in Sales

Emotional intelligence was coined for a paper by Michael Beldoch, Clinical Professor of Psychology in Psychiatry at Cornell University. It was made into a buzzword by Daniel Goleman and his 1995 book Emotional Intelligence.

In the book, Goleman claims that EI matters more than technical expertise when it comes to job performance and leadership, and that 67% of the abilities required for success derive from emotional intelligence.

This rings true in sales, where the ability to develop and sustain relationships is essential to success. There’s only so much that theory can do. The true test of a great salesperson is when you put them in stressful situations. Many make the mistake of letting their emotions overpower their purpose/ goal. This leads to unproductive behaviors, such as product dumping, pursuing non-qualified leads and more. It can also turn prospects off, instead of bringing them into the fold.

A study by Gallup consultants Tony Rutigliano and Benson Smith claims that customer satisfaction and loyalty depend on their emotional connection with the salesperson. They say that a customer is 12 times more likely to remain loyal if they like the salesperson.

Top Emotional Intelligence Competencies in Sales

There are key emotional intelligence competencies that are shared by successful salespersons.

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in the shoes of your prospect. It is when you go outside of yourself in order to be aware and understand another person’s feelings and needs.

In sales, it bears on your general outlook towards another person. Are you able to look at them objectively? Do you try to understand their motivations? Is your customer service attentive and able to anticipate customer needs?

Shift your focus from your prospects for a moment and look at yourself. Remember that you also have your own set of motivations and needs. You have your own strengths and limitations, as well.

Wherever you are in ‘knowing yourself’ affects how you reach out to others. Do you come off as confident? Are you able to stand your ground and persuade your audience to consider your side? Can you influence and gain the commitment of your prospect?

Colleen Stanley puts it succinctly: “Know thyself. What are your hot buttons? What situations cause you to react or not act in a manner that serves you well personally and professionally?”

Once you have a good level of self-awareness, you can be strategic in how you approach business relationships. Play on your strengths instead of highlighting your weaknesses. Put your best foot forward as you work towards self-improvement and becoming a more emotionally intelligent salesperson.

A salesperson eats rejection for breakfast. Thus, if you want to succeed in this field, you need to have a healthy level of self-esteem. Rejection is a part of sales. A salesperson achieves success by facing this reality, and waking up each day ready for breakfast!

What do you want for yourself and how do you hope to achieve this? Are you driven enough to try to attain your goals? Do you have what it takes to sustain the work necessary to achieving these goals?

There is a process in sales, which usually takes months. It is not a field suited for someone who is incapable of delayed gratification. The hours are long; and the work can sometimes be frustrating. You need to be driven, consistent, and optimistic if you want to succeed in sales.

Emotional Intelligence for Your Sales Team

Several high-profile companies, such as Motorola, 3M, American Express, Honeywell and MetLife have begun to offer emotional intelligence improvement programs as part of their management training. While EI in sales is still new, several sales leaders are already integrating emotional intelligence training into their sales training programs.

According to Collen Stanley: “Elevating your Sales EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient) helps you sell bigger deals, in less time at full margin…. You have a sales team that knows how to manage themselves, read prospects better and overall are more enjoyable to work with.”

This article is written by Dan Sincavage, and is originally published at Tenfold.

Apr 24

Self-Awareness Test: What is your natural communication method?

By shaydawkins | Mental & Emotional Health

Self-Awareness Test

Category of Self-Awareness: Natural Personality
Aspect of Self-Awareness: Natural Communication Method

Understanding your Natural Communication Method (NCM) is important, but it is also important to note that you are capable of learning the other communication methods. It is important to understand your NCM; so, you are enabled to create a role in your vocation that most embraces your NCM.

Natural Communication Method Test

Below are ten horizontal rows with four words on each line. In each line, put "4" below the word or statement that best describes you in that row; a "3" below the word or statement that describes you next best; a "2" below the next best word or statement, and a "1" below the word or statement that least describes you. On each row, you will have one "4," one "3," one "2," and one "1."
Total PA:

Total PA-AS:

Total AS:

Total AG:

Likes to Listen

Likes to Share Knowledge

Likes to Provide Guidance

Likes to Inspire & Motivate

Sensitive Feelings

Likes Instructions


Takes Charge




Decision Maker





"Rules should be fair."

"Rules should be followed."

"Rules can be bent."

"You make your own rules."

Enjoys Helping

Enjoys Communicating

Enjoys Variety

Enjoys New Challenges



Solution Finder

Solution Creator

"A Master Healer"

"A Master Communicator"

"A Master of Pragmatic Solutions"

"A Master Motivator"

"Keeping the peace is most important."

"Fairness is most important."

"Results are most important."

"Progress is most important."

Avoids Confrontations





*Total up the numbers for each vertical column (PA, PA-AS, AS, AG).
The totals directly correlate with what communication styles you innately possess or don’t possess as shown in the following breakdown:
36-40: Extremely High
31-35: High
26-30: Moderately High
21-25: Moderate
16-20: Moderately Low
11-15: Extremely Low

Again, one style is not better than another. Ideally, you will want to create somewhat of a balance among the differing methods because this will enable you the versatility to be successful in various roles of your vocation and personal life. Below you will find how the differing styles break down.

The Counselor, “A Healing Listener”

Strong Traits: Empathy & Understanding
Role: Resists giving advice. Shows you your options passively.
#1 Mental Talent: Great Listener
#1 Spiritual Talent: Discernment through Empathy
Animal: The Lamb


The Teacher, “A Master Communicator”

Strong Traits: Excellent Communicator & Knowledgeable
Role: Communicates knowledge & insights. Shows you “how to do” something.
#1 Mental Talent: Effectively Communicates Knowledge
#1 Spiritual Talent: Intuitive Communication
Animal: The Owl


The Adviser, “A Master of Pragmatics”

Strong Traits: Logical (Primarily) & Intuitive (Secondarily)
Role: Asserts the best option to take & provides council, secondarily.
#1 Mental Talent: Logical Problem Solver
#1 Spiritual Talent: Discernment through Intuitive Understanding
Animal: The Elephant


The Coach, “A Master Motivator”

Strong Traits: Intuitive (Primarily) & Logical (Secondarily)
Role: Motivates others to accomplish their goals.
#1 Mental Talent: Creative Problem Solver
#1 Spiritual Talent: Intuitive Intelligence & Discernment through Vision
Animal: The Tiger








Dec 13

The Truth: Jesus’s True Two Commandments

By shaydawkins | Intellectual Rebel Podcast , Redifining Religion

“Solution” Shay Dawkins, host of the Intellectual Rebel Podcast, explains the truth, a global truth, by defining Jesus’s Two Commandments that are not preached, discussed, or emphasized nearly enough. For both the religious and the anti-religious, know that Jesus’s Two Commandments are quite different from the many messages of Christianity. Jesus’s message is truly quite practical yet profound for anyone, regardless of your belief system, because it focuses on showing you where to find true love, how to find it, and how to truly live in love via learning to have a loving relationship with yourself. Continue reading

Jul 31

Your Beliefs Are Your Religion (Guest Article)

By realminded22 | Redifining Religion

Religion is defined as the ‘belief in and worship of a superhuman controlling power, especially a personal God or Gods.’ The general notion with religion is this idea of an extraordinary power external to us will aid us through our individual lives, especially when we’re faced with testing times. Don’t get me wrong, with the balance of the universe and mankind, you will need your share of luck or at least a feeling of it; the truth is, there’ll be bad luck and there’ll be good luck, blessings and lessons, but if we were to solely rely on luck to be in our favour, for most of our lives, we’d become helpless and possessed by life’s way of being rather than our own.

As a religion is based upon a constitution of beliefs, so are we as human beings, but a lot more of them as we are wholly reflective of our beliefs and disbeliefs. Our mind is the complex system we find ourselves in that can grow us into the character we aspire to be or similarly, grow us into the character we don’t want to be; either way, the mind matters most because it’s the source of change and your highest power.

The 3 C’s of life:


“You’ve got to make the choice to take a chance if you want your life to change.”

 It all starts with the choices you make; it often helps in your daily vast living to consciously gather your thoughts together mindfully. In those moments, you can help yourself regain focus on the larger picture and more notably, the steps in front of you that are there to be taken in the moment.

Your journey to self-discovery and self-mastery starts with unleashing the Godliness that lies within you, to commit to what seems extraordinary and beyond your doing because nothing that matters to you is beyond that, it’s just beyond your knowing, in the unknown, waiting on you to find it.

“The only real limitation on your abilities is the level of your desires. If you want it badly enough, there are no limits on what you can achieve.” – Brian Tracy

Don’t succumb to nor amplify the weaknesses within you that waste the finite mental energy you have, nor the false belief that chance will lead you to all that you want to have and the person you desire to be. Life is an exploration of your mind to uncover the beliefs and realisations that will take you to your own place of entitlement.

Open your mind and you open yourself to new ideas and new possibilities, or else, remain enclosed to what you already think and know and limit your doing at your own peril.  Just because you’ve come to a standstill in your own comfort doesn’t mean time has; time is forever passing and change is occurring, always.

“We cast away priceless time in dreams, born of imagination, fed upon illusion, and put to death by reality.” – Judy Garland

 Time is priceless and when we don’t use it with our sense of purpose as often as we can, we become overly influenced by the external world and its own complexities, especially with other minds and contradicting beliefs. For you to serve a life that satisfies you, you’ll need to worship the beliefs that’ll serve you.

“The significance of being born human is that you have the potential to become limitless. It is up to you to live your Godliness.” – Sadhguru

Your affirmations will shape you as a character, shape the journey you endure and the experiences you live to see. Belief roots from self; the key belief to withhold through everything life puts in front of us is belief in ourselves. Believe in yourself so deeply that you are consumed by that belief alone; the unimaginable becomes doable and your life will transpire into a journey of living rather than existence.

This is a guest post from Ajay Mohanadas. Mr. Mohanadas is the Founder of He is a student of life and a free thinker. He believes “life is best seen as a process through progress.”



Jul 30

Just the T.I.P.

By shaydawkins | Mental & Emotional Health


“Let’s play a little game called Just the TIP. Just for a second. Just to see how it FEELS.”

T.I.P. = Thought In Progress

Blinded Driver

How would you like to drive without the ability to see?

What if I told you that many people go through their entire life blinded because they are not consciously aware of their thoughts?

What if by changing your thoughts enabled you to literally begin changing your life?

First off, this article is not a “positive thinking article” that will tell you to “just be optimistic.” This article is a self-awareness article that emphasizes the importance of “thought awareness” along with “thinking for yourself.” A thought in and of itself will not create change in your life, but many similar thoughts repeated over time will, for better or worse, create meaningful change in your life. To explain how this change takes place, I first must explain that there are two different types of consciousness (awareness), the conscious and the subconscious. In a nutshell, the conscious is what you are aware of (what you see) and the subconscious is what you are not aware of (what you don’t see) yet is greatly effecting you. For example, the conscious is like the software on your phone (i.e. the apps on your phone and all the things you can visually see when you are using your phone) whereas the subconscious would be like the hardware in your phone that you don’t see (i.e. if you open up the back of your phone and look at all of the inner parts, then that would be your subconscious). Both the software and hardware of your phone are equally important and essential for your smartphone to work properly.

Consciously Rewire Your Subconscious

Your conscious FEEDS your subconscious, and your subconscious effects you exponentially more than your conscious. This is why a positive thought or “just thinking about what you want” will not get you what you want yet many positive thoughts repeated consciously over time will begin to bring you what you want. Many people get what they do not want because they have been unconsciously feeding their subconscious negative thoughts of “what they do not want” for a LONG TIME. Your subconscious mind is unemotional and simply grows what it is fed; hence, your subconscious does not see positive (good) or negative (bad). If you have been unconsciously thinking negative thoughts for a prolonged period of time, then I am going to be honest with you in that it will take time, discipline, and desire to rewire your subconscious to work for you rather than against you. For example, two people want to quit complaining; one person has been complaining for two months while the other person has been complaining for twenty years. In most cases, it will be easier for the person who has been complaining for two months to change their HABIT than it will be for the person who has been complaining for twenty years because the longer you have created the habit of doing anything makes it that much more challenging for you to change the habit.

With that being said, I will make you a promise. My promise is to you is that no matter how long you have been practicing negative thoughts or what negative things you have done, it is 100% possible for you to rewire your mind and ultimately rewire your life to how you see fit. Furthermore, I have some really good news and some “not so good news” to share with you. The really good news is that there is a short-cut that will enable you to consciously rewire your subconscious mind much more quickly and powerfully than just “thinking positive.” The “not so good news” is that this short-cut is hard work.

The Short-Cut

The short-cut to rewiring your mind quickly and powerfully for the betterment of you and all those you care about is to create the HABIT of dwelling in POSITIVE EMOTIONS. Think of your emotions as your “limitless power resource.” It is scientifically proven that your heart emits energy (“vibes”). When you begin to FEEL and DWELL in positive emotions, you literally begin changing the energy (“vibe”) around you, for the better. On the contrary, when you are FILLED with negative emotions, you literally begin changing the energy (“vibe”) around you, for the worse. For example, think of yourself driving your favorite sports car, and perceive your emotions as “your fuel.” When you are unemotional, your car is in first gear (you are traveling very slowly); hence, the thoughts you are thinking are traveling very slowly into your subconscious which is causing you to rewire your subconscious very slowly. When you are highly emotional (positive or negative), your car is FLYING down the road quickly just like “nitrous oxide” causes a car to go faster; hence, your thoughts are traveling quickly into your subconscious which is causing you to rewire your subconscious quickly. The key difference between a person dwelling in positive emotions versus a person dwelling in negative emotions is that a person dwelling in positive emotions will be focused on solutions (“what they want”) whereas a person dwelling in negative emotions will either have no focus or be focused on problems (“what they do not want”).


So, how are your emotions generated?
Well, there are many factors contributing to what emotions you are feeling, but the #1 way you generate your emotions is through your thoughts. Here is a small excerpt from my book, iSin: Upgrade To Life 2.0, explaining how your thoughts generate your emotions:

Thoughts Generate Emotions

Article originally posted on




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